Archive for the ‘Writing’ Category

8 March

Collage

I’m making a collage
in my mind
out of your smile.
I’m including all
the times, places,
and ways that I have seen it.
It’s an easy project,
every way I mix and match
the seperate images
on the canvas of my mind
they come together
seamlessly.
It’s a selfish project.
The canvas glows
with your joy and warmth
but I keep it
to myself
inside my little head.
Fortunately,
anybody who’s met you
can just go
start their own.

8 March

I sat on a bench once

I sat on a bench once,
and the first thing
I thought of
was my love.

We’d sat
and joked and laughed
on a bench
once,
and for some
reason, this time
reminded me

The first thing
that came
was the thought,
like words
forming
a sentence;
I sat on a bench
with my love
once.

Next the image
hit me.
Eyes open,
alone
in a park,
seeing everything
around me,
I saw
her.
I saw
the way she sat
on my lap
and poked my
side to tickle me.
It didn’t work.
I don’t smile.

But
after the vision,
came
the feel.
Her warm
body against mine,
her cold hands
sheltering
from the wind
in my own.
Pleasant, calm,
soothing.
I wanted to be
there
again.

Memories make fools
of us
wanting to go back.

In the next breath
was the smell.
Filling my nose,
my lungs,
my body.
Her hair smelt
like blossoming
flowers eager
for the honeybee’s
touch.
Who gives a damn
if it was perfumed
by shampoo
or conditioner,
it was her smell,
on her hair,
with me.

She kissed
me that day,
quickly,
not so quickly,
her taste
was there.
Her feeling
was there.
The passion though,
a distant echo,
lost
to the tendencies
of time
and memory.

So I sat there,
alone,
on a bench,
trapped
in another time,
another place,
where I could caress
her face, touch
her hair, feel
her warmth, taste
her lips,
be happy.

My heart ached
it had not forgotten
anything.
I had forgotten
the loneliness,
but not
my heart.

I sat on a bench
once,
and the first thing
I thought of
was my love.

8 March

I dream

I do not
expect
my dreams
will ever
come true.

But,
I’m getting
older
and nights
can be
lonely.
So,
I choose
to dream,
all the same.

I’ve always
been afraid
of falling
through the sky
and that
is what I see
in your eyes.
I am not
afraid
of falling.

Your skin
smolders
against my
finger tips
igniting
long dead
fires.

Your lips
taste like cherries
Your tongue
like chocolate
gourmet dessert.
As a child
I could never
appreciate
such sweets.

I let myself
dream
awake and asleep
shallow, and deep.

I dream
of lazy Sunday
brunches
and holidays
worth
being excited
about.

But alas,
these are but
dreams,
ethereal phantoms.

I do not
expect
my dreams
will ever
come true.

But,
I choose
to dream
all the same.

8 March

One Man Show

Five days ago
we came here
together
we walked
we talked.
I was sure
we would
do it again.

Last night,
I let myself
dream,
dreams that will
not
come true
dreams of me
dreams of you.

Today
it is time
to forget.

You do not
need me
or my support,
too strong
too smart
you will move
on
just fine
without
me.

You did not
know it,
but you stepped
into, filled
the shoes
of a part
I was not
holding auditions for
then made it
your own.

You will
decline
the role;
there will be
no
casting call.

I’m perfecting
the art
of the performance
absent
your role.
I like to think
I make
a better
one-man-show
anyways.

8 March

I am practicing my Zen

I wish
I could show you
the things
you’ve inspired
me to write.
It has been
a long,
long, long,
time
since a woman
inspired me
to write.

I am practicing my Zen.

I don’t know
what to do
about your
sadness.
I wonder if
when its over
you’ll still want
to talk to me.
I don’t know.

I am practicing my Zen.

I was feeling
my age
when I met
you,
I’ve been feeling
younger
since the first time
you smiled
at me.
I wish you smiled
at me
every day.

I am practicing my Zen.

Honestly,
I don’t think
my dreams
of you
are less real
than any other
dream
of any other
thing.
Still they are
dreams.

I am practicing my Zen.

I suspect
our relationship
is one based
on circumstance.
Circumstances
change.
I do not think
I will hear
from you
as much
when your
circumstances
change.

I am practicing my Zen.

I am remembering
how to feel
things I
forgot
to feel.
I am remembering
to see
with eyes I
forgot
how to open.
I am remembering
how to Love
like the Buddha
we have all
forgotten.

I am practicing my Zen.

If you leave
I will continue.
It is tricky,
caring
without
attachment.
I’ve been waiting
a long time
for the chance
to learn.

I am practicing my Zen.

But
it would be
nice
if you were willing
to try caring
with attachment.
My self
doubt
tells me
that wont happen.

I am practicing my Zen.

With luck,
the solution
will present
its self.
If there
is no
solution

I am practicing my Zen.